Heartbreakers & Heartburn - A Short Execration

I’ve fought against it for a long time, but I cannot any longer

While the pandemic did not lead to a posting frenzy it did afford me the time to log in plenty of reading, both RPG related and otherwise. Always on the lookout for ideas to better suit the game for my purposes, I had already dipped my toes into the second edition of AD&D, at first as nothing more than a quest for curios, “just some window shopping, check any systems that I can wrap the ol’suckered tentacle on”. Of this I found more than I’d wagered I would, past the sandbars of naff cartoony illustration work and nestled among stuff like decreasing AC, Thac0, overland movement points, 2/3rds or 3/4ths modifiers and other assorted baroque design choices, jagged reefs that had previously kept me well at bay, was a trove of thoughtful writing made with the game in mind. It certainly wasn’t perfect – heck, much of the time it wasn’t even good – but it resonated within me with an irrational nostalgia for what had never been. So odd it was for me to feel this attraction to an edition launched barely within my lifetime that my subconscious must have begun looking about for the why of it.

As my chariot of thought was drawn along the seasons, hitched to idle rulemaking and campaign feverdreaming, the side by side comparisons started tapping at my cheeks, playfully at first but insistingly and with increasing force. There was something moving against me, a great avian shape, dark of wing, foul of smell and utterly soulless.

 

Fifth edition.

 

Truly, it had become as an albatross perched upon the shoulder, it’s weight unbearable, it’s shape revolting to look upon.

Matters came to a head as I started moving away from the free range of action subsystems and diving into the realms of spellcasting, class writeups and a skill system (or the questionable necessity of one), as drafts were successively discarded and time was spent fruitlessly poring over different older books, the impression that a game bereft of DCs and passive perception could not be conceived of began slowly eroding away. Juvenis loomed large over my mind, of course, and I also came across the deeply flawed thing of beauty that is Dark Sun.

For what little more I read of the 5th edition core books, the more their insufferably sappy prose and patched-together nature needled my eyes, where I once thought the monster manual, the class list, the straightforward mechanics and the spell lists had some sheen, now I saw only the uncommitted oversimplification and the sheer blandness of it all. It is true that 2nd Edition was already the result of corporate cogwork but I found its design ethos and level of detail to be at least adequate, the writing to have a much more sober tone and the whole to stand as positively soulful compared to the present edition’s paper-thin pandering, with its grating use of the second person and rules designed by comittee.

Suffice it to say the sore thumbs became infected. Adding to the replacement of modifiers for excessive dice rolling (even for me), the dissociated healing, the stupid baked-in “proficiency modifier”, the incipient skill system that’s about as good as having nothing at all, the tacked on “death saving throw” and “Hit Die” travesties and the lack of facing in combat came the templated and repetitive class structure, the “Challenge Rating” foam padding, the uninspiring spell list, the pervasive use of advantage in lieu of any kind of subtlety and the inane feat list. In sum, the mechanics all reeked of nonchalance, as even some of the concepts I did like were revealed as having originated with AD&D or, in other cases, with 3rd edition. I was ever aware that much time would be spent under the hood and looked forward to it, but between working to fix what’s broken and oiling up what’s left, my efforts to keep the beast approachable started feeling more and more misplaced. Between running highly modded 5E or modded 2E, any of which to the point of unrecognizability, why persist on dragging this millstone around? Strangely enough, the straw that dislocated the camel’s vertebrae was the difference between modern stat-blocks and the former ease with which stats could be concisely inserted on a random table or hex description without breaking stride. Ultimately the conclusion came that if I’d initially tied myself to this rusted anchor of a system it was because, frankly, I did not know any better.

So this is me, the crunch lover, putting distance between whatever I do next and fifth edition. I’ll keep some morcels here and there, and I will, of course, need to revise much of the little I’ve done, but everything was due a revision, sooner or later.

Here follows a commemorative picture to aptly relate the tribulations of the heartbreak designer, that being the fellow on the lower right.

 

Allow, if you will, a moment to clean the froth buildup at the edges and let us proceed to something more productive. Not for me to make a post solely to beat a supine equine. 

Here follows a cornerstone of the system on which I plan to rely for the perceivable future. On the altogether likely chance this has already been seen and done on any among the constellation of systems in existence, I claim for me a shield of ignorance.

Attribute Checks

Whenever a character attempts an action whose outcome is uncertain, the player is informed by the rules or referee adjudication of which attribute the action calls upon and the corresponding difficulty, which can be standard, difficult, very difficult or impossible.

Success is determined by a d20 roll whose result is equal to or inferior to the number prescribed by the action’s difficulty:

·         Standard task – roll is compared to the attribute score

·         Difficult task – roll is compared to half the attribute score (round down)

·         Very Difficult task – roll is compared to the twice halved attribute score (round down)

·         Impossible is self-explanatory. No roll need be attempted.

– All checks are assumed to be of standard difficulty unless specified otherwise

– In addition to the difficulty, circumstancial modifiers both numeric and in the shape of advantage or disadvantage may be applied to the roll. Exceptional success, if applicable, is represented by an unadjusted roll of “1”, and exceptional failure by an unadjusted “20”

Note that there’s no unified fundamental resolution system, as not all actions will prompt an attribute check and may instead have different systems for producing results.

Combat, as ever, is to be handled on an ascending basis of d20 plus modifier versus target number. Contests are likewise represented by comparing ascending d20 rolls.